THE BUST

A few years ago, Joseph was finally given an exit permit by the Russians and allowed to emigrate to Israel to join his family. He was told that he could only take what he could pack into one suitcase. At the Moscow airport he was stopped by an enormous customs officer who glared at him and snarled, "Open the case!"

Joseph opened the case and the Russian rummaged through the meagre belongings and pulled out a large bundle wrapped in old copies of Pravda. He unwrapped it to reveal a bust of Stalin.

"What is that?" snarled the customs officer.

"What is that?" said Joseph timidly. "You shouldn't ask 'What is that?' - you should ask 'Who is that?' That is our glorious leader Stalin. I'm taking it to my new home to remind me of all the wonderful things that he did and the marvellous life that I am leaving behind."

"I always knew that you Jews were mad!" said the official, tossing the bust into the case. "Go!"

A few hours later Joseph arrived at Ben Gurion airport and was confronted by an Israeli customs officer. "Shalom. Welcome to Israel.
Open the case!"

Once again Joseph's belongings were examined and the customs officer came upon the bust.

"What is that?" said the customs officer.

"What is that?" said Joseph indignantly. "You shouldn't ask 'What is that?' - you should ask 'Who is that?' That is the bastard, Stalin. I'm taking it to my new home to remind me of all the misery and suffering that he caused me for most of my life. I want to spit on it every day for the rest of my life."

"I always knew that you Russians were mad!" said the official, tossing the bust into the case. "Go!"

At last Joseph arrived in his new home and eventually got around to unpacking, watched by his young nephew. He took out his few clothes and then carefully unwrapped the bust of Stalin and put it on a table.

"Who is that?" asked his nephew.

"Who is that?" said Joseph with a smile. "You shouldn't ask, 'Who is that?' - You should ask, 'What is that?' That is five kilos of gold and a bit of black shoe polish."

Sent by Prakash Bhartia
The above reminds me of an incident many years ago.
We lived in East Pakistan which is now known as Bangladesh.
I used to go to a boarding school in Kurseong from March to November
One year I was returning from my holidays during end February to go to School.
Since my father did not get his visa in time, i was returning by train with my mother.
We were accompanied by one of my father's friends.
As soon as he entered the compartment, he put a gold statue of the Taj Mahal on the table between two first class seats and put a towel casually over the statue.He had got the statue made in Dacca.
At the Darshana checkpost the customs people came to inspect our luggage. He just laughed and joked with them and gave them free passes to his cinema hall.The customs did not check our luggage.
He followed the same procedure in Banpur, the Indian border.It was much later that Gede was made the border check post.
Thus, he got the gold statue through both check post.
My mother and I were scared out of our wits until the train left the Indian border post.
So you see, not only Jews but Marwaris are also foolhardy.