Some Miserly Jokes

Miser : How do you sell these bananas?
Shopkeeper : Rs 1/- each.
Miser : Will you sell for 60 paisa each.
Shopkeeper: With 60 paisa you will get only the banana peel.
Miser : Here, take 40 paisa. Keep the peel, give me the banana.

A miser was on his deAthbed.
Miser :My wife, where are you?
Wife: Yes, I am here.
Miser :My sons and daughters, are you all here?
Yes Papa.
Miser: Then why is the fan still running in the other room?

A miser gave his blood to an Arab Sheikh and saved his life.
The Sheikh gifed him a Mercedes car.
The sheikh had need for blood a second time..
The miser willingly donated his blood again.
The sheikh gifted him a big packet of sweets.
The miser angrily asked why he was not given a mercedes this time.
The sheikh smiled and replied that now he too had a miser's blood in him.

A miser called up a newspaper office and asked, " my father is dead, what are your charges for insertion of an obitury?"
Newspaper: Rs 50/- per word.
Miser: "Very godd. Write "Sohan Singh dead".
Nespaper: "Sorry sir. It should have minimu of 6 words."
Miser: "Let me think..... OK, write "Sohan Singh dead - Suzuki for sale"

Miser to Shopkeeper: Give me a toothbrush, My brush has lost a bristle.
Shopkeeper: Why are you buying a new one if the brush has lost only 1 bristle.
Miser: It was the last bristle on the brush.

A miser was sinking with the Titanic, yet he was smiling.
Friend: Why are you smiling?
Miser:I am smiling because I did not buy the return ticket.

Sent by Prakash Bhartia