Sunday, March 24, 2013

Watching Death - Do miracles occur.

My cousin brother Bijay, was suffering from heart ailment since a few years. His valves were giving him problem.

Professionally he was a Pandit doing Puja with a limited source of income but too proud to ask for help.

The people who came to his mandir for worship and those to whose office he went to do Puja assured him of all help if wanted to have an operation. But they never kept their word and his condition deteriorated.

Finally when it became unbearable, he informed us.

The doctor who was seeing him advised a further angiogram to check the condition of his heart. I didn’t agree with the decision so we took him to Dr. Sunil Lihla of Rabindranath Institute of Cardiac Sciences, Kolkata. He had performed my brother’s and my angioplasty.

On seeing the reports Dr. Lihla informed that two of his valves were not functioning properly.

He advised us against doing the angiogram in Calcutta and instead to rush him to Dr. Devi Shetty’s “Narayan Hrudalaya” in Bangalore. He feared that if we did the angio in Calcutta, he would be advised valve replacement and he feared that in Calcutta the risk of losing him would be 20%.

Although RTIIC was a part of Dr. Shetty’s hospital chains, he still advised us to go to Bangalore for greater safety.

On Monday 11.2.2013, at 7.15 am we (Bijay, his son Vikas and I) flew to Bangalore as we did not want to waste time. It was a wise decision for his condition, after admission into the hospital, deteriorated so much that if he had been brought by train, he would have expired on the way.

He was immediately put under emergency support system by 3.00 pm and until Wednesday his condition remained serious as both his heart and lungs were in serious condition.

On Wednesday evening they did a C T Scan of the thorax to go into the problem of the lungs.

A pulmonologist was called to help in the treatment. His sputum as sent for testing.

On Wednesday night a new problem developed. Bijay got it into his head that the hospital staff, doctors and nurses wanted to kill him so he stopped taking any food or medicine from them.

At 10.45 PM, we were called to the hospital to assist them in handling Bijay.

We stayed the whole night with him in the CCU, holding his hand and reassuring him.

By around 5.00 am he had cooled down sufficiently to take medicine from us. He still would not take medicines from the staff and would shoo them away if they came nearby.

Staying in a CCU, if you are healthy is a frightening experience.

Two patients died that night in the CCU and when the patients condition become serious, the rushing of the doctors and nurses to help the patient makes you heart beats run like a steam engine. Then in the morning, one of the patient’s relatives came into the CCU and started crying loudly.

I suppose, the deaths too may have played a part in worsening Bijay’s condition.

We remained with him the whole of Thursday, giving him his prescribed medicines. The results of the sputum test came. Both TB and cancer was ruled out. However blood continued to come in the sputum which had the doctors worried.

Finally in the evening a psychiatrist was called to assist in treating his paranoia. It was only after the medicines prescribed by the psychiatrist were given to him; he cooled down and fell a sleep.

At 10.00 PM, I went off to the hotel to sleep. Vikas stayed with him until 5.00 am, just in case he again woke up and caused problems. Friday was uneventful, in that Bijay slept the whole day under the influence of the sedatives given by the doctor. However, now, he started fearing the staff would kill me and his son and advised us to go away from the hospital.

We tried to meet Dr. P V Rao, who would be performing the valve replacement surgery. However, he was busy and we could not meet him. So we set up an appointment with him for Monday, 17.2.2013.

It is only after meeting him can the dates for Angiogram and the surgery be finalized.

On Monday after waiting from 10.00 am, we could finally meet him at around 6.00 PM.

On seeing Bijay’s reports, he informed us that his condition is serious and his chances of surviving the operation would be only 25 %.

Bijay’s condition is so weak that he may die on the operating table. He asked us to take a decision whether we should go ahead with the operation.

I had been observing Bijay for the last 10 days and could see that if we took him back without the operation, he would not last more than a few months. It was decided to go ahead with the operation and we decided to bring his wife and daughter-in-law to Bangalore for the operation.

Dr. P V Rao went and saw Bijay after our discussion and he confirmed his earlier statement.

Dr. Sunitha Abraham then confirmed that she would start taking necessary action for the angiogram. Bijay was put under medication to reduce his INR which was 3.2. She said it had to come down to 1.5.

His potassium too had to be increased.

On Wednesday the INR had reduced to 2.9, which was still high. His potassium too had increased. Dr. Sunitha said that the medication would continue to bring down the INR further and some more doctors too would examine him.

Dr. Rajagopalan, a second pulmonologist who had been referred to by Dr. P V Rao, informed that because of Bijay’s poor health, they would not do surgery on him. We should take him back. In the evening his condition became worse and he was again moved to CCU. He was put under Vent API for the whole night. This is a machine which pumps oxygen directly into his lungs.

On Thursday, there was no improvement in Bijay’ s condition.

Friday - 24.2.2013. Met Dr. Devi Shetty through Rajiv, his secretary.

Vikas cried in front of Dr. Shetty that he could not manage his father’s treatment and he doctors were saying they would not perform the operation. Dr. Shetty assured him not to worry about the charges. His father’s condition presently did not allow for the operation to be done now. Later on, if his condition improved, they would perform the operation.

Again Bijay started getting into the phobia that the people wanted to kill him. He was again given sedative and put under Vent.

Saturday. Bijay is drowsy. He was under the vent the whole night with 80% O2 volume. He was very drowsy. He was not passing urine adequately and it was building up inside him and he had to be given Lasix injection continuously.Since his BP was low, he had to be given Dopamine injection continuously.

Since Lasix reduces BP and Dopamine increases heart rate and BP, these had to be balanced delicately as .

Sunday – condition remained the same. No vent was put at night.

Monday, 25.2.2013 – Reached Hospital at 8.30 am. Bijay’s condition became bad in the morning. He was put in Vent. Sputum report came. Bijay was found to have Klebseil Pneumonia. This is highly infectious and the staff was advised to wear gloves and mask while treating him. We too have been asked to stay away from him and wash our hands with alcohol after contacting him.

Tuesday, 26.2.2013 - Bijay’s condition remained critical throughout the day. We stayed the whole day in the hospital. At around 10.45 pm, we were suddenly called to the hospital. We were informed the his BP was dropping and we should stay nearby. Vikas and I stayed the whole night at the hospital. His BP varied from 90/60 to 55/30.

At 4.00 am, I went back to the hotel to take a quick nap and Vikas returned at 6.00 am.

I returned at 8.45 am and found the doctors and nurses pumping Bijay’s chest. I realized that the last moments had come and so called his family from the hotel.

They came immediately.

The doctors tried their best but I knew that all their efforts would be in vain.

At 10.30 am, they declared him dead.

The above episode made me wonder if miracles occur, or even if God listens to our prayers.

Here was a man who was a Pujari, a Hanuman disciple who had built a temple in his home and did Puja and Aarti meticulously in both mornings and evenings.

His whole family was praying for his well being.

My wife and our family are disciples of Sant Asharamji Bapu.

We prayed continuously for a miracle to save Bijay.

Whatever Pujas, rituals, mantras suggested by anyone was carried out.

Nothing happened. Bijay died.

My conclusion.

Lord Krisna said in the Bhagad Gita, you do your Karma and leave the result on ME.

You have the power to do your karma but the result depends upon ME.

Does He change His results as per our prayer?

I don't think so.

Prayers do not affect HIM.

Lord Chesterson may have said, "More things are done by prayer than this world dreams of"

But I do not agree with him.

Prayer gives you the inner strength to help you pass through difficult times.

It makes you feel that you have a supporter in God and thus make you increase your efforts to achieve your goals.

It is YOUR efforts which help you, if it was ordained by God.

If it isn't, no amount of efforts on your part will help you.

On the other hand, if you did not make those efforts, you would never achieve those goals.

Prayer plays no part in getting what you want except giving you the inner strength.

Hence the first condition is that you make your effort.

After that whether you get or do not get what you want depends on what HE has programmed at the time of your birth.

He is Omnipotent, Omnipresent.

He has lived through all ages, past, present and future.

He does not have any form and yet He assumes the form of all beings in the Universe.

He does not require our flowers, water and other offerings.

Prayers are just an expression of what we humans feel would be appreciated by God.

Just as we appreciate gifts and good talk, we feel God too needs the same.

I believe God has programmed our whole life, including death, at the time of our birth on the basis of our past Karmas.

He does not change that, no matter what we do or offer Him.

He has made certain rules and regulations on which the whole Universe runs.

We humans are still trying to discover those laws.

If we follow those laws, we will have healthier lives and live longer.

Bijay had problems with the valves in his heart.

He could have lived longer, if he had taken action earlier.

However, he financial condition did not allow him to take action until it was too late.

That is the apparent cause.

However, the root cause is that God had programmed Bijay's life for only 57 years.

So how could Bijay have done otherwise?

Once you realize this, you move out of the sorrow and joy of death and birth.

One of the first laws of God is do karma, for without karma, life cannot go on.

Even when God comes to the earth in any reincarnation, even He has to do karma.

The second law is that you are bound by the results of your past karmas.

Good karmas give good results and bad karmas give bad results.

If you want to get out of this cycle of rebirths you have to make your karmas - niskarmas.

That is offer all your karmas to God.

This you can do if you know your karmas are good.

That makes you want to be good.

God is also called SATHCHITANAND.

This consists of three words

. SATH - means -truth, for only HE is the TRUTH. All else is false or temporary.

CHIT - means - mind- for HE is in the mind. Our whole body is destroyable. Only the MIND or SOUL is indestructible.

ANAND - means - Bliss - for only HE is Eternal Bliss, all else is temporary.

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