Smileys

While browsing through the few messages we received this week, I present these smileys collected from different sources just to make your Sunday much brighter

Radheshyam

Following the footsteps of the Master..

The Old Preacher

An old preacher was dying.
He sent a message for his IRS agent and his lawyer, both church members, to come to his home. When they arrived, they were ushered up to his bedroom.
As they entered the room, the preacher held out his hands and motioned for them to sit on each side of the bed.
The preacher grasped their hands, sighed contentedly, smiled and stared at the ceiling.
For a time, no one said anything.
Both the IRS agent and the attorney were touched and flattered that the old preacher would ask them to be with him during his final moment.
They were also puzzled because the preacher had never given any indication that he particularly liked either one of them.

Finally, the lawyer asked, "Preacher, why did you ask the two of us to come?"

The old preacher mustered up some strength, then said weakly, "Jesus died between two thieves, and that's how I want to go, too."

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.Well,here is one example

Retirement Fun!!

The other day John and Mary went into town and went into a shop. They were only in there for about 5 minutes.
When they came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket.
John went up to him and said, 'Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?' He ignored him and continued writing the ticket.
John called him a Dumb ass.
He glared at John and started writing another ticket for having worn tires.
So Mary called him a shit head.
He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first.
Then he started writing a third ticket.
This went on for about 20 minutes.
The more they abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Just then their bus arrived.
John and Mary have a little fun each day now that they are retired.
It's important at their age

Those who live in glass houses ....

Dialing Wrong number
Bob was sitting at the table one morning, reading the paper
after breakfast.
He came across an article about a beautiful actress who was
about to marry a football player known for his lack of IQ.
He turned to his wife and said, "I'll never understand why the
biggest jerks get the most attractive wives."
The wife blushed and whispered,"Thank you, darling"

The following one is of those who used to cram essays for the exams. In school we did not have much of this but in college we used to have boys learning essays by heart.

A sardar for an exam had studied only one essay ‘FRIEND’, but in the exam the essay which came was ‘FATHER’ . he replaced friend with father
in the essay and it read: AM A VERY FATHERLY PERSON, I HAVE LOTS OF FATHERS,
SOME OF MY FATHERS ARE MALE AND SOME ARE FEMALE. MY TRUE FATHER IS MY NEIGHBOUR

More things are done by prayers ....

The Stormy Sea

As the storm raged, the captain realized his ship was sinking fast. He called out, "Anyone here know how to pray?" One man stepped forward. "Aye, Captain, I know how to pray."

"Good," said the captain, "You pray while the rest of us put on our life jackets. We're one short."